Showing posts with label Austin Film Festival. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Austin Film Festival. Show all posts

Sunday, October 26, 2014

Terrible Love the Movie for Veterans with PTSD

Behind Terrible Love Story Real Families
Wounded Times
Kathie Costos
October 26, 2014

Life for veterans and families with PTSD can be terrible at times. So much so that it makes all the talk show tales of troubled marriages look easy. Speaking as a wife of a veteran with PTSD for 30 years, the movie Terrible Love comes as close as a civilian can get to seeing what our lives are like. Beyond the headlines there is real heartache.

Our lives are harder than most will ever know. Christopher Thomas wanted to tell our stories condensed in the story of a National Guardsman and his loving wife as their world fell apart. Our lives are complicated by the emotional rollercoaster corrupts even the strongest bond and while we fight to help our husbands/wives heal, we battle our own inner conflicts of wanting to stay and fight for the sake of those we love or walk away for our own futures. Can we do it? Can we fight hard enough and long enough to make it all work? Can we go on never knowing one moment to the next that will happen to us or because of us if we react wrongly?

The movie was intended to let families know we are not alone and what we are going through is our normal even though it is all abnormal to the rest of country.

We have to decide to keep fighting the VA for what they need and fighting to hang onto hope that it can get better or give up on all of it.

During the filming and editing Christopher struggled with getting the story right. He wanted to go beyond showing us we are not alone into reaching citizens trying to understand us when all they get are news reports on stories when it has been too late to do much good for anyone.

We were the audience he dedicated three years of his life to without being one of us. We were the people he spent countless hours and sleepless nights trying to get it right for and he achieved it. I've been reading reviews on Terrible Love but this one made me cringe
"The big problem with this type of story right from the outset is that no matter what tricks a director employs, we will never know what it is like to go through something like that unless we actually do."
(You can read more of this review below)

He learned what it was like because we spent countless hours on the phone and email Q and A for three years. He watched the videos I made, read the stories on Wounded Times and asked me about what he did not understand. He wanted to know about us as well as all the families I worked with over the years trying to get them to a point in their lives when loving them didn't feel so terrible.
After reading the review, this is the comment I had to leave.
Wounded Times Blog
I was the consultant on the PTSD part of this film. After 3 years of Christopher's heart invested in this project along with everyone else, I have mixed feelings about this review. I take your point on the music and the rest of the comments as truthful however it would have been more honest to also add in that this was his first movie and he did it out of love, not for his own glory.

Three years ago he called and wanted to learn about PTSD, what far too many were going through, because he wanted to do something to help. He wanted to tell a real story of what life was like but didn't have connections to make it happen. He did what he could with very little support, so what he managed to do with Terrible Love showed not only his talent, but his commitment to our veterans and families.

Christopher told a story of what life is like for many veterans and for the families they come home to. Lost and confused, wanting to help but not knowing what to do. Our lives are very hard but few others dared tell what it is like.

Did he hit all the Hollywood grades? No but the veterans community is grateful he did what really matters, He made Combat PTSD real for everyone to understand and be touched by it.


'Terrible Love' (2014) Movie Review
While it features some powerful moments, the film is too overwrought to fully resonate.
Rope of Silicon
Mike Shutt
FRIDAY, OCT 24, 2014

Movies about soldiers coming home from war and trying to acclimate back into regular society can be very tricky. They are often too sentimental, too alienating, or too histrionic. It is difficult to make a situation like that exist outside of cliché and feel honest. Directors try so many different things to visualize PTSD, from flashes of the soldier's moment of trauma to screaming fits to being unable to do a certain task. The big problem with this type of story right from the outset is that no matter what tricks a director employs, we will never know what it is like to go through something like that unless we actually do. Soldiers who suffer from PTSD are changed people in every way, and we can only observe how the react. Terrible Love, the debut feature of director Christopher Thomas, tries to have a natural take on the situation, complete with totally improvised dialogue, but in postproduction, the emotional manipulation gets turned up far too high for the drama to breathe and sink into its audience.

Amy Urbina and Rufus Burns play, well, Amy and Rufus (all the characters have the actors' names), a married couple reuniting after Rufus's year-long deployment in the Middle East. He is returning home two weeks early after his humvee hit a land mine, causing him to completely lose eyesight in his left eye. Initially, their reunion is joyous, filled with a lot of montage kissing, but after a few days, things for Rufus start to go very sour. He gets night terrors, gets very distant from his wife, has small triggers that lead to big episodes, and struggles with taking care of himself and their daughter Aubrey (Aubrey Davis-Williams). Amy tries to accommodate, but day after day, the strain between them becomes greater and greater.
read more here


The end of the movie does not have to be the end of their story. It isn't the end for any of us as long as we get the help we need to stay and fight for them side by side. Because people like Christopher Thomas are out there, we're a lot closer to changing the conversation from headlines to our reality.
UPDATE Review Austin Film Festival
"Terrible Love" and PTSD and what happens when we are closed versus what happens when we are open
Film Colossus
by Chris Lambert

So Terrible Love's Rufus is one of the most tragic characters I've seen in a film. Why?

Because he is incapable of expressing his pain.

Which is what makes Terrible Love so fascinating to me.

The premise of Terrible Love is that Rufus (Rufus Burns) is an American soldier who leaves, shortly after his wedding to Amy (Amy Urbina), for a tour in Iraq. Eventually, Rufus is injured and discharged. PTSD will happen.

I'm sure much of the talk about this movie will revolve around its portrayal of PTSD, how accurate it is or is not. The film functions, in a way, as a critique of the poor support system for many veterans. Also for the spouses of those veterans. For example: there's a scene where Amy tells her friend, another military wife, that she's scared of Rufus. And the friend tells Amy that Amy is being dramatic and selfish. Yeesh.

I think the movie takes on a larger subject than PTSD. A simple, universal truth that is the film's real power. Openness versus Closedness. Specifically, how easy it is to be open about positive emotions and experiences, and how difficult it is to express negative emotions.

The first 20 minutes of the movie captures this in such a beautiful way that it made me cry.

The film opens with Rufus and Amy reciting their wedding vows. Plenty of friends and family are there. The bride and groom express, out loud, for everyone, how much they love one another, how much they need one another, etc. etc. This positive spirit lingers, even when Rufus heads to Iraq. His time there and Amy's time at home is captured in summary. The time they are apart takes less than 5 minutes in the film. We see them going about their lives (domestic things contrasted by graphic imagery from the Middle East), knowing they miss one another, knowing they care about one another—their wedding vows still fresh in our minds. We don't see Rufus in pain. We don't see Amy in pain. Even when Rufus's car rolls over a land mine and he's hurt: we don't see him screaming, crying or anything. In fact, we get a phone call from Rufus saying everything is okay and then cut to him coming home, to the happy reunion between him and Amy in the airport.

We follow the reunion with 8 minutes of wonderful domestic life. Amy and Rufus are both happy. We see laughter, affection, joy. Until the 16 minute mark when Rufus has his first on-camera instance of PTSD. As he hunches and cries and yells and hyperventilates, Amy asks: "Are you okay? What's going on? What is happening? Are you in pain? What's wrong? Are you okay?"

Rufus tells her nothing.
read more here

Thursday, October 23, 2014

Austin Film Festival Terrible Love About PTSD Featured Today

Ultra5280.com
A veteran comes home from Iraq after suffering an injury to his eye. Rufus, played by Rufus Burns, brings back more than a physical injury to his family and wife Amy (Amy Urbina). As time goes by, the evidence of Rufus’ PTSD becomes clearer to Amy but is shrouded from those around the couple as they figure out how to battle this disorder and repair their marriage.

TERRIBLE LOVE is the debut feature from director Christopher Thomas and producer Luke Helmer. Following in the footsteps of Drake Doremus (LIKE CRAZY), the actors improvised their dialogue after heavy outlining and pre-production work. The grounded nature of this style gives it an immediacy and authenticity that is able to deliver an unflinching look at a devastating disorder.

Review from Splash Magazine Yenis Monterrey
"Find out what happens in this realistic story that many veterans deal with in real life. Director Christopher Thomas says his film was inspired by friends suffering from post-traumatic stress disorder, or PTSD. Don’t miss “Terrible Love” screening and find out the unveiling story behind this couple dealing with PTSD."
This is the movie I consulted on for 3 years with Christopher. I can tell you that there was a deep, emotional connection to this labor of love from everyone involved, especially from Christopher. He struggled to get it right, so right that even after knowing it from start to finish, when it was done, he blew me away by what he had accomplished!
Action! Austin Film Festival starts Thursday
By KXAN News
Published: October 23, 2014

AUSTIN (KXAN) — The 21st annual Austin Film Festival kicks off at the Paramount Theatre. Al Pacino’s “The Humbling” premieres, along with several others throughout the next few days. For one week, more than 180 films will be showing.

Austin Film Festival co-founder Barbara Morgan spoke about how the festival is more than film screenings. People who want to get a kick-start can help get their career going, and there are workshops incorporated into the festival.

Director Christopher Thomas has a film, “Terrible Love,” screening Thursday night. He says his film was inspired by friends suffering from post-traumatic stress disorder, or PTSD. “Terrible Love” screens Thursday at 9:45 p.m.
read more here

Monday, October 13, 2014

Terrible Love "A bittersweet autopsy" of Combat PTSD and love

It doesn't have to end like this
Wounded Times
Kathie Costos
October 13, 2014

First the good news. No relationship has to end just because they come home with PTSD. We've been married 30 years. The other good piece of news is, if I can learn what PTSD and the difference between what civilians get compared to what veterans end up with, anyone can. If I can learn what it is, why "he" has it but others didn't and what I can do to help him live a better life, anyone can.

All too often, it is not about how much we love them but more about what we are willing to do to make it work.

Terrible Love
About three years ago I received an odd phone call. His name is Christopher Thomas. He said he found my site while searching for information on PTSD. Christopher told me that while he never served, some of his friends did and he wanted to do something to help veterans. He wanted to tell their stories through their eyes. No Hollywood type looking to make a fast buck. This project meant something to him.

I put him to the test. I told him where he could find my videos. I told him to catch up and contact me with any questions he had. He did and he had plenty of them.

I still wasn't sure about him until I asked "What's your goal?" His answer was "To do whatever I can no matter what I have to do."

There were times over the years when the title of the movie was part of what he was going through, when it seemed as if this movie would never get made. He didn't give up. The script was done and redone. The done again. After that, it was a matter of finding the people. He just kept trying until he found the right actors, crew, places to film and people to lend a hand.

The day the movie was finished was not the end of the story. Much like the lives of our veterans when they come home. Their jobs while deployed are over. National Guardsmen take off their uniforms, go back to their families, friends and neighborhoods. Look forward to going back to work on their jobs, if they were lucky enough to still have one or start searching for a new one if not. The end of their service story is not done. It is never really finished. It becomes a part of them.

They can get lucky, have people surrounding them with a full understanding of what is going on with them even if they cannot feel it as well, or they can return to people pushing them away during a time when they need them the most.

Oh, it isn't always the fault of families or their friends. Most of the time it is a matter of no one told them anything they needed to understand to do anyone any good. They cared but they didn't know how to help. Now they may know just enough to change the conversation from what is wrong to what is right, what can heal and the reason they have PTSD.  They love.

They love the men and women they serve with to the point where they are prepared to die for their sake.  They love them enough to grieve so strongly it rips them apart but they push on those living on.

When people think about war, it is alway about the brutality of it forgetting about the strength of the human spirit.  Compassion and courage always pushed aside simply because they cannot understand where all that comes from. That is is that very basis within them that compels them to serve when they know they could die.  Some simply feel it all more strongly than  others and that means they feel the pain more strongly than others. Then it feels terrible to love.

Terrible Love is in the Austin Film Festival
"A bittersweet autopsy of mental illness and lost love, Terrible Love tells the story of Rufus, a wounded veteran returning home from Iraq with post-traumatic stress disorder, and his devoted wife Amy. They promised themselves never to leave each other, but that promise is put to the ultimate test when Rufus’ PTSD becomes violent. Terrible Love dives head first into the heart-breaking effects of PTSD, the relationships it hurts, and the lives it threatens."

One in three veterans come home with PTSD. Terrible Love tells the authentic story of the struggles, dangers and sacrifices of a life and a relationship threatened by PTSD. 

Here's our trailer, and if you're in Austin, come see the full film at the Austin Film Festival - October 23 and 26


Terrible Love - Trailer from Helmsman Studios on Vimeo.